I need your help...

Hey Verbalizer,

I have been sitting with something for a while now, and I think it is finally time I shared it with you.

For years, in workshops, coaching sessions, and quiet conversations with women who looked on paper like they had it all together… I kept noticing the same pattern show up.

It was not a lack of skill.
It was not a lack of intelligence.
It was not even a lack of confidence.

It was something quieter than all of that.

It was the moment, just before speaking, where she would pause and silently ask, "Am I allowed?"

And whether she realised it or not, that one tiny question would change everything that came after it.

It changed the words she chose.
It changed the tone she used.
It changed whether she showed up at all.

Over time, I started to see that this was not really about confidence.
It was about PERMISSION.

And once I named it, I could not unsee it.

I saw it in the woman who waited until everyone else had spoken before sharing her view, even though her view was the strongest in the room.

I saw it in the leader who softened her opinion with "this might be silly, but..." before saying something genuinely brilliant.

I saw it in the founder who had built something extraordinary, but still hesitated to put her own face on her own brand 😅.

Different women. Different rooms. Same quiet question underneath: "Am I allowed?"

The more I sat with it, the clearer the picture became.

Permission is like standing at a door that has been unlocked the whole time, but waiting for someone to walk over and turn the handle for you. The door is open. The room is yours. And yet… you wait.

So I have started a project to help solve this problem.

I am working on my first book called THE POWER OF PERMISSION, and honestly, it is the most personal piece of work I have ever taken on.

It is for the woman who is capable, accomplished, and ready - but is still quietly waiting for someone, somewhere, to tell her she is allowed to take up the space she has already earned.

And here is where I need you.

Because this book is not just mine to write.
It is ours.

The women I have coached over the years have taught me more about permission than any book or course ever could. And the women reading this newsletter, you, carry stories and wisdom that I have not lived.

So as part of my research, I would love to hear from you.

Just two questions. That’s all.

1. Where in your own life do you struggle to give yourself permission to show up or speak up?

At work? At home? In rooms where you feel out of place? In your business? In your relationships? In how you spend your time?

Be as honest and specific as you feel comfortable being.

2. What area do you believe it is most crucial for us, as women, to begin giving ourselves permission in?

What’s the one place where, if women stopped waiting, the world would actually shift?

If a story or example comes to mind, please send that too. Even a few sentences would mean the world to me.

You can simply hit reply. Everything you share comes straight to my inbox, and anything I quote in the book will be anonymised unless you tell me otherwise.

And whether you reply or not, please take one thing from this email.

Permission was never something other people were going to hand to you.

It was always yours to give.

I cannot wait to read what you send me.

Love, Laughter & Light,

'Ronke